About 15 years ago, I went with my teacher Naren who trained me on various life skills, way of life, meditation, business, emotional management, and so much more, to meet someone. Naren conducts Life Leadership courses in Pune, in his orgainsation – Lifeschool. We went to meet a business associate – Mr. Vilas to participate in Naren’s program – Let’s Explore.
Mr. Vilas’s office was in Vimannagar area in Pune. We followed the location and reached his office. It took us a good 20 minutes from main road. The moment we reached, I happened to comment, “Vilas Sir, your office is so inside.” With a wry smile he just nodded, and said, “Yes, it is.”
We had a good meeting with Mr. Vilas. He liked the concept and decided to join the course. I was happy that I could make them meet. He was struggling in business and his personal life wasn’t doing great either. I was very sure that the course will help Mr. Vilas. Through Naren, if I could help someone, I would be very happy.
As we sat in the car, I asked Naren about his thoughts about Mr. Vilas and his reading of the situation. He gave his insights and I was amazed as always – as to how he could read between the lines, and the body language of the individual. Gently Naren told me, “Amit – that comment you made about, ‘your office is so inside,’ wasn’t a great thing to say. The moment you said that, his face turned little sad.” I was listening. Naren continued, “I agree with you that the office was far from the main road. But when you know that someone is not in the best phase of his life, we should avoid making such comments. Instead, you try to find out something good about that place and be explicit about it. Maybe that is the spark that gets them back on track.”
I felt little bad for what I might have done to Mr. Vilas that day. I didn’t realise that it could create such an impact for him. But Naren had completed the conversation saying, “Incase he doesn’t sign up for the course, don’t feel bad that it is because of you. It’s completely his decision and nothing to do with what you said.”
I learnt a big lesson that day and have been implementing it from the day onwards. Anytime I meet someone for the first time, I love to appreciate atleast one thing about them, or the place. I have made it a habit. Specially, when I know I am meeting someone who isn’t in the best phase of their life, I try to make things light or make them feel special about something. I appreciate them about a quality which is genuine and true. Who knows that might just be the spark they need.
As a result of that feedback, I am not the same person anymore. I ensure that I make people feel comfortable, loved and wanted. As a human being that’s the minimum I feel I can do. This small shift has made my relationships better and long lasting. Yes, people, situations and places will have their limitations. But my search now has become – the good I can see and letting them know about it!
A beautiful reminder of the power of our words. What stayed with me was the lesson that if we have nothing good to say, it’s often better to say nothing at all. A genuine appreciation can be the spark someone needs, while a casual remark may leave an unintended impact. Thank you for sharing this thoughtful experience and the positive change it brought about in you. 🌷
Thank You Mam ….
You are absolutely right. Our words can have an impact – Good way or Bad way! Hence we need to be careful with our use of words.