When it comes to people and relationships, there are bound to be conflicts, disagreements and discomfort. Each one of us would have come various situations where you would be stuck at a point and the other person involved stays put on their take! It’s a deadlock situation!

There are two ways this deadlock ends –

1. One person gives in to the other’s demand

More often than not, the person who gives in feels unhappy. Heart of heart He/ She has thousand questions running in the mind – why should I always compromise; she never understands my perspective; just because he raises his voice and I don’t, doesn’t mean I am okay with their say; I am always taken for granted; and so on

I have invariably been on the other side – always giving in. It did lead me to lose my self-belief and confidence. There used to be lots of time where I felt that I am not good enough and hence maybe the other person was right. It took me a lot of time to unlearn that feeling. It took continuous efforts in actions and self-talking to reverse the feeling!

2. It ends in a tiff and there is no resolution

This is probably the worst situation to have. Egos are on a high at this moment. None of the parties is willing to take a step back. I have seen best of friends become enemies; marriages fall apart; siblings unable to look eye to eye; business partnerships getting dissolved; companies shutting down; employee-employers at verbal wars; etc.

The message in such situations is clear to each other – I will not budge, come what may. It only adds to stress, anxiety, worry and jealousy. Nothing positive ever comes out of it.

How should the situations then be resolved?

I have realized that if I happily give in it doesn’t make me feel low about myself. Whenever I have been compelled to give in is when it hurts.

The relationships that I want to be forever, I should happily give in if there is a conflict. Afterall they are my loved ones. If there are situations, which won’t make any massive difference to my life, I must give in to keep things peaceful.

If you are on the other side – where there seems no resolution, the first thing is to realise that your ego is playing a big role here. Try to figure out the immediate loss that may arise due to giving in. If the loss isn’t as big, vis-à-vis the future outlook then it is worth letting go.

I am still unable to resolve, what should I do?

If you are still not able to find a resolution, find a neutral person to help you. Who is a neutral person – It is usually a person whom we know is fair; will have a neutral mindset; has enough experience to be able to guide both the parties; and can say right to right and wrong to wrong without being biased on who is talking.

Finally, I would like to conclude by saying that – do not leave any issues unresolved. If they are solvable, find a solution before the problem gets bigger. Inspite of all efforts, if the situation isn’t getting resolved, accept the fact that there might not be an immediate solution, but maybe in the near future. Some situations get healed with time when emotions and ego settle dow.

All said and done, the most important thing is your peace of mind. If certain situations and relationships are causing stress, it is worth either resolving or forgetting about it. Do not leave anything hanging or unresolved.

REMEMBER – in most situations, it is always possible to find the mid-way! All you need is a deep intent and a resolve to find a resolution. Not for others, but for yourself!

SEE YOU MID-WAY!

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