DATED – 22nd August 2016

As all of us would have already heard – out of billions of people alive today, no two human beings are same, nor will ever be. Each human being born on this planet has their own thought process and way of doing things. God has made each one of us unique.

We know it as information, but don’t implement it to live a peaceful life. We seemingly want people to follow what we are saying. If they do anything against what we think is the right way to handle a situation, we get angry and irritated. Let me give you a few examples –

• You have done business in a particular way. You expect your son do work the way you worked. But, things change in 20 years, don’t they?
• You want your wife to explain the directions to someone in the way you have asked her to do so. Incase she does it her way, you are left fuming.
• Your employee might have a style of selling, which doesn’t appeal to you. But yet he might be making great sales.
• The way you have parented your sons, might not be the way to parent your grandson. What your son needed would be very different to what your grandson needs.
• You have been driving a car for long. When you are not sitting in driver’s seat, learn to sit back, relax and enjoy the drive rather than giving instructions to the driver.
• You might like to eat with a fork and spoon, but someone might just prefer using their hands to eat food.
• You might think that until you get angry, work doesn’t happen in India. But someone right next to you will get things done by making them their friend.
• You might want your daughter to wear certain clothes; but she hates wearing them. She chooses her own style.
• You might prefer guests to be greeted in a particular way. But your son has different opinion on the way he welcomes some guests depending on his experiences with them.
• You have a strategy, which you think is mind blowing. But your partner doesn’t really think so. Maybe he has a point.
• As a wife, it is unfair to expect your husband to do whatever you have said without any questions.

I am attempting to bring you to a point that not always your opinion or way of doing things is right one. Someone might have contradicting suggestions, which might actually be better provided we keep ego aside and believe – My way is not always right. My way is not the highway.

It is not a good to impose your ideas on anyone. When you do so, you rob your people of confidence. They become dependent on you for anything in life. They might never become decision makers. You might feel you are helping them by giving direct orders. Though your noble intentions are beyond doubt, you will make them weaker. After all everyone has to live their own life. You cannot practically be there for someone each and every moment. Sometimes they will be on their own. Your job is to build their confidence.

Vis-à-vis my life –

I never impose anything on anyone. I feel that everyone has their set of beliefs and background and hence each individual might look at a situation in different way. Some outlooks are better than mine. When I don’t impose on people, I allow them to do things their way. Apart from giving confidence, it also gives them space, which is one of the most liberating feelings, if I may add. Not imposing things has made me build deep relationships, made me more patient and got great results as a leader.

The sooner we realize the fact that people might have their own opinions, the faster we will be able to allow them to do things their way. At times, you might be able to anticipate that they will fail. But until a child falls, it never learns to walk. But once it walks, remember it will also run. They will learn out of failures. Those failures are worth it. Give people space. Do not impose your thoughts and beliefs on your loved ones. Remember – YOUR WAY IS NOT THE HIGHWAY!