DATED – 26th September 2015

About five years ago, I had gone for a swim. As I was swimming, I saw a coach teaching a man how to swim. I excitedly asked the coach if he could help me fine-tune my strokes. He looked at me and said, “My friend, it is easier to learn afresh, rather than fine tune. The most difficult thing to do in swimming is to UNLEARN.”

Isn’t this true for so many things in our daily routine too? As we live, various incidents, insights, learnings, circumstances, etc shape our thoughts, nature and personality. Let’s see if you can relate to these –

• You believe getting angry on petty issues has become your nature. How much ever you try, you can’t control your anger.
• Whenever someone offers you a solution, your first response is negative. Being positive right from the word ‘go’ seems impossible.
• Your presence at home terrorises your kids. You didn’t want to build that image, but it happened. It is tough to change that now.
• Friends don’t appreciate your style of communicating. But, that’s how you are. You seem to say – Take me or leave me.
• You always seem to have an opinion for everything, without listening to the other person completely. You don’t have patience to allow them to explain themselves.
• You have been working for the last twenty years in a particular style. A total new way of doing business is not your cup of tea any more.
• Your handwriting looks like ants crawling on paper. You have attempted enough to write properly, but have failed miserably.
• You eat very fast and defy science that emphasises the importance of chewing food properly. If you eat slowly, somehow, you don’t feel contented.
• Unless you have your cup of tea in the morning, you will have a terrible day. Though you know it is not a great habit, yet you cannot overcome it.

For all the above issues wherever you think you can’t unlearn / change, my question to you is – REALLY? You think you can’t unlearn things, even if they have become your habits and attitudes. I think you would be fooling yourself if you believe that. There is nothing possible on this planet that a human being can’t do, once decided. History is filled with such examples.

If possible, do take a little while and jot down things that you must – UNLEARN! You might just stumble upon something, which has been holding back some beautiful moments in relationships, get you a leap in business, put you enroute to becoming an amazing parent, and so on.

Vis-à-vis my life –

I have always been a very good observer. In fact, a lot of my growth happens because I observe things well and learn out of them. I think that quality has always helped me to unlearn and hence change to keep upgrading myself.

The intention to unlearn that which is not so good about you is a great asset. It is easy to just carry on with your routine life and cover it up by saying – that’s my nature / habit. It takes courage to admit to yourself that something is not okay in you. Going a step further is to implement things and become better. Though it might be a little tedious process, but it is totally worth to UNLEARN!