There are 4 phases or stages of life, known as the Ashramas in our Indian culture. The four ashramas are: Brahamacharya (student), Gṛhastha (householder), Vanaprastha (forest walker/forest dweller), and Sannyasa (renunciate).

If we look at them we can identify the first one – Brahmacharya Ashram as a learning phase, where one assimilates knowledge and builds their quiver of arrows in preparation for the real world. These are days of doing. Where discipline, consistency and thirst for knowledge will be crucial for making the most of this phase.

In the second phase, as a Gṛhastha we need to draw from our resources that we gathered up during  the previous phase. Life throws every possible curve ball at us during this phase. This is when we begin our career, start a family, build our own identity, etc.. There are a lot of ‘firsts’ that happen during this phase. This phase we could also consider as the days of doing.  

After these many years of doing, and trying to build a life for themselves, what then prompts someone to even consider giving it up and moving on to something else? 

Because there are no set rules, that at the age of X one is to stop being in Gṛhastha and at age Y one is to consider Sannyasa. 

It is all very subjective and differs from person to person. One might choose to remain in a particular phase forever or stay in one for the longest time before choosing to move on to the next phase. 

Besides, it is not compulsory to do all stages at all. These are guidelines for an ideal life for an individual and not a set of rules.

It took me a while to figure out what days of understanding were. What helped me was drawing up a comparison between the days of doing and days for understanding.

When I was thinking about this comparison – I realized that at times, I am just doing something because it needs to be done. I might not necessarily know why I am doing it or what would be the impact of my action if I did do it or even the impact of my inaction. 

I also realized that days on which I completely know what I am doing, why I am doing it and everything else associated with that task – I do it much better. The effectiveness of my actions is optimum and the results are near perfect. 

I have another example for you – something very small, but this was my ‘aha’ moment in realizing the distinction between days of doing and days of understanding. 

When I was small and was learning spellings in English, I only knew one way of knowing them; which was to learn them by heart. This was my way of doing.

Years later, when my children were in the same phase, I saw how they were being taught how to “build” a spelling. I observed how the emphasis was on the sounds of the alphabets and then how they sounded when they were put into a word together. This spelling building exercise called phonics/phonetics was the AHA moment for me! In that moment I now knew and understood how to build a spelling rather than memorize it. Needless to say, both my children are excellent with spellings and did not even for a day struggle with spellings, ever! 

This was the distinction for me – when I was memorizing the spellings, those were my days of doing. When I learnt how to build a word – those were my days of understanding. 

This ability to understand – was truly powerful. It gave me immense confidence. It made me feel in control and above all it gave me the right tools to overcome anything (in terms of words) for all my life. That is real empowerment. 

So, our days of understanding empower us to face the world and be a better version of ourselves.

As we grow older what satisfies us more are days of understanding. These enable us to enjoy the process of doing what is needed with the best possible tools available at that time.

In the above spellings example – you could place any example and see for yourself how the two scenarios are distinct from each other.

Let’s take ‘charity’. In our growing up years, we are told that doing charity is good. You are told why you must make it a part of your life, how to carve out a bit from your salary for this noble deed.  You might have gone ahead and done your part. It even helps a bit with your tax! As you grow older – you understand the deeper meaning of charity and you would then take the trouble to find a cause you really believe in and contribute to an organization that helps with that cause or issue. You may also spend your time and participate in activities put together by that organization. It is here that you understand that, helping monetarily was just one way – it is much more impactful & meaningful for you to contribute your time and effort there. 

Think about your own examples for a deeper understanding of your days for doing and days for understanding.

My journey with these still continues.