Olympics and Paralympics just passed by and what an event to witness India winning medals. I have been following Olympics since my school days as it was a fantasy then to view multiple events being held in a common campaign. But when I got into details of such major events, what used to catch my eyes each time was post semifinal of an event where you had a Bronze medal match (for deciding the 3^rd position) and a Gold medal match (for deciding the best) that reflected in a schedule. And there was never anything that mentioned the Silver.

Everyone knows that Gold medal is the one given to the best, Silver to the second best and Bronze to the better amongst the rest of participants. Interestingly, studies in sports psychology have shown that silver medalists are often less satisfied than bronze medalists. In terms of the events mentioned above you get a bronze and gold medal after winning a match. However a silver is always received after losing the final for gold.

While the bronze medalist is typically relieved to have made it onto the podium, the silver medalist is preoccupied with how narrowly they missed the top spot. This creates a stark contrast in emotions, where the second-place finisher feels a sense of loss, while the third-place finisher often feels a sense of gratitude. The silver medal, then, becomes a symbol of unfulfilled potential rather than a mark of achievement.

Something related to this emotion was what I felt on 19^th Nov 2023, the Cricket World Cup final, a tournament where India was the only country to remain unbeaten till that date. India won Silver, but eyes were only numb. Another such emotion was experienced for Neeraj Chopra who won silver after winning gold previously.

Does the phrase capture the notion that coming in second place, while still a commendable achievement, often feels more like a loss than a victory? For those striving to be the best, missing out on first place can overshadow the success of being the second-best in the world? This idea reveals a deeper truth about human ambition, competition, and the relentless pursuit of excellence.

The Relentless Pursuit of Perfection

At the heart of this mentality is the relentless pursuit of perfection that drives many competitors. Athletes and high-achievers push themselves beyond their limits not simply to participate, but to win. The idea of being “the best” is ingrained in their identity, and anything short of that can feel like failure. This mindset explains why some of the greatest athletes, entrepreneurs, and innovators in history have often expressed dissatisfaction with being second, even when they achieved extraordinary feats.

For individuals with this mindset, the silver medal serves as a painful reminder of the work left to be done. It highlights the small margin by which they fell short, and it becomes a driving force to train harder, improve, and ensure that next time, they will stand in the top spot. The pressure to succeed, however, can come with a cost. It may overshadow the value of progress, learning, and incremental improvement, which are crucial elements of long-term success.

The Psychological Weight of Coming Close and Losing

The sentiment behind the phrase “You don’t win silver, you lose gold” is heavily influenced by the psychological phenomenon known as “counterfactual thinking”. This type of thinking occurs when individuals compare their actual outcomes to alternative scenarios that could have happened. In the case of a silver medalists, the comparison is not between second and third place, but between second and first. The silver medalists contemplates how close they came to winning and what they could have done differently to secure victory.

In any form of competition, whether it’s sports, business, academics, or even personal endeavors, the primary goal for many is to come out on top. In this context, silver – or second place – might as well be considered first among the losers. The athlete who wins a silver medal doesn’t focus on the achievement of being the runner-up; instead, they reflect on how close they came to the gold and, by extension, how they fell short of their ultimate goal.

In these moments, the silver medal feels like a reminder of what could have been, rather than an accomplishment in its own right. The focus is not on being second-best in the world but on the heartbreak of not being the best.

Is Silver Really a Loss?

Despite the emotional weight of losing gold, it’s important to recognize that silver – or second place – is still a remarkable achievement. In most competitive scenarios, being the runner-up means outperforming the majority of participants. Silver medalists are still the second-best athletes in the world in their respective events. This is a feat that many could only dream of achieving.

Yet, the perception of second place as a loss speaks to the high standards that individuals often set for themselves. This perspective can be both motivating at times, as it drives people to push beyond their limits and continually improve.  One must understand that Gold has its importance because of Silver. Even if Silver remains the shadow of Gold, there should be a belief of shadow being inseparable.

Reframing silver as a stepping stone rather than a failure can be a powerful shift in perspective. Competitors who come in second often use the experience as motivation for future victories. Instead of focusing solely on the loss, they analyze their performance, identify areas for improvement, and channel their disappointment into determination for future competitions. In this sense, losing gold can be transformed into an opportunity for growth and a catalyst for future success.

Implications in Life

While the phrase “You don’t win silver, you lose gold” is often associated with sports, its implications reach into many areas of life. In business, for instance, companies are in constant competition to be market leaders. Being second to market can feel like a missed opportunity, especially in industries where first movers often dominate. In academic settings, students who aim for top honours may feel the sting of falling just short, even if their performance is exceptional by other standards.

This mindset can also apply to personal goals and achievements. People often set ambitious targets for themselves, whether in their careers, personal growth, or creative pursuits. When they fall just short of their ultimate goal, the feeling of loss can be overwhelming, even if they’ve achieved something remarkable in the process. The key is to balance ambition with perspective, understanding that progress is a valuable part of the journey, and not every near-miss is a failure.

While this mindset can fuel the pursuit of greatness, it’s important to remember that silver is still a significant achievement. The terms are relative and so is the situation. The journey, the growth, and the determination that come from falling just short of first place are often what lead to ultimate success in the long run. In the end, it’s not just about winning gold, but about continually striving to be better and recognizing the value of every step along the way. Rather than being competitive, it should be more of meditative.

Hope that some day what Bob Marley mentioned becomes true, “Don’t gain the world and lose your soul, wisdom is better than silver or gold.” What’s your say?

Akshay Kothari
Silence Spoken