‘Vibhishan’ in LANKA

This Diwali we decided to create various items out of Concrete for gifting. It was the first time we decided to do something like this. We had no idea on – what kind of raw material is suitable, how much material will be needed, what kind of resources are expected, who will buy, how will we sell these products, will we even break even, and many such questions. Yet, we decided to take the plunge! To our joy, people showed interest. The orders started flowing in and soon we were short of material. I called the factory and told them to speed up the production and send us the raw material. They obliged and shipped same day. The next big task was the transporter. The factory owner and me, con-called him and requested for fastest possible delivery. He too agreed! We were excited for the next day! Come next day, and horror struck. The material had not even left the transporter godown. He simply said, “Yes, I did promise. But there was too much load. Couldn’t send your material. Will send next day.” We were devastated – how will we ensure the timely delivery of orders? I immediately rang up the factory owner. I started complaining about the transporter and how unprofessional he was. He heard me out and shared his experience of the transporters in the last forty years. He summed it up beautifully, “This transporter is like the Vibhishan in Lanka!” There are many things around us, which don’t seem to be going well and the way we want it to be. We have complains about our loved ones; issues with our fellow people at work; irritating behaviours of our maids/ employees; lacunas of our vendors; nagging nature of our in-laws (can be – son, mother, father or daughter), limitations of our leaders; and so on. Our focus is invariably on things that are not okay. But at the same time, we cannot do without them. We definitely need them for us to grow, progress and make our life smoother. Yes, they have their limitations, and it is easy to get angry on them. But think about this – Don’t we too have our limitations? How come we forgive ourselves so easily and punish others? Isn’t this hypocrisy at its best? I learnt a big lesson that day – There are some people who are like tyres on whom our life runs smoothly. Yes, sometimes there are punctures, and the roads can be filled with potholes causing us discomfort. But without the tyres, it is impossible to move ahead. It is never the case that our life will stop because of someone’s absence. But without these people, our lives will get tougher on a daily basis. Some contributions are obvious and recognised, but most are silent and hidden, which often goes unnoticed. It is time we recognize who are such people in our lives, without whom there will be tremendous discomfort. Once we recognize these people, a bigger challenge awaits us. We need to ignore the Ravana qualities in them and focus on the Vibhishan qualities. Once we are able to make this shift on our thought level, we will see a big dip in our stress levels. Afterall the maximum stress comes through people whom we love the most. If we can look at the good in them and ignore/ tame the limitations in them, we would have done ourselves a great favour! Diwali symbolizes Lord Ram’s victory over evil and his return to Ayodhya after 14 years of exile. At the onset of Diwali, I wish that we all make this shift – Focus on FINDING THE VIBHISHANA qualities in people who are important to us! Lord Rama found Vibhishana and won over Lanka! It is time for us to find Vibhishana and win over Lanka in our lives!

DEMOGRAPHIC DILEMMA : ‘THE HUM DO, HAMARE TEEN’ DEBATE

HUM DO, HAMAARE TEEN A CALL FOR FUTURE DEMOGRAPHIC STABILITY Appeal is rooted in demographic science.  When a society’s total fertility rate (TFR) slips below the replacement level of 2.1, each generation is smaller than the last, and without migration the population inevitably contracts. Experts argues that, since a woman cannot bear a fraction of a child, 2.1 effectively means three births per couple. If the average stays below three, the community’s size will gradually diminish and may eventually “go extinct” in relative terms. Thus, his slogan is a warning, not a political slogan, drawing on well‑established population research . A GRAVE CHALLENGE Despite India’s growing economy, per capita income remains insufficient to support significant demographic changes. As women become more educated, independent, and vocal about their rights, societal shifts are underway, marked by rising divorce rates and a trend towards childless marriages, redefining traditional family structures. This changing landscape poses challenges for the government’s efforts to promote larger family sizes. India’s evolving social fabric reflects progress in education, gender equality, and individual freedom, but also brings new challenges in terms of declining fertility and changing family patterns. The government should act as a facilitator, supporting families who wish to have children while respecting those who choose otherwise, maintaining balance in population policies through a well-rounded approach that is free from coercion but rich in incentives and social support, ensuring India manages its demographic future without compromising individual dignity and choice. INDIA’S EVOLVING SOCIAL FABRIC : Balancing Growth, Demographics, and Family Choices India stands at a demographic crossroads. While its economy is expanding rapidly, the per capita income remains insufficient to support significant demographic changes. At the same time, women are becoming more educated, independent, and vocal about their rights, which is reshaping family structures. Rising divorce rates, growing acceptance of singlehood, and an increasing trend towards childless marriages are redefining traditional norms. In this context, government policies to promote larger family sizes face multiple challenges. A balanced approach is required to respect individual choices while ensuring demographic stability. Education and Family Planning Empowerment through knowledge: Education, particularly for women, directly influences fertility choices. Educated women tend to delay marriage, prefer smaller families, and focus on career development. Accessible family planning: Strengthening healthcare networks and providing free or low-cost contraceptives ensures individuals make informed reproductive decisions. Balanced impact: While smaller family size is a natural outcome of education, it helps prevent overpopulation pressures, ensuring resources are not overstretched. Economic Support for Families Childcare benefits: Rising costs of raising children discourage larger families. Subsidized childcare centers and workplace daycare can reduce this burden. Parental leave policies: Extending maternity and paternity leave ensures that both parents can share responsibilities, making parenthood less stressful. Education subsidies: With education costs being one of the biggest deterrents to larger families, subsidies or scholarships can encourage parents to consider having more than one child. Convincing balance: Such measures reduce the financial fear linked with child-rearing without pressurizing individuals into decisions against their will. Changing Social Norms Respect for family diversity: Not all families look alike today—single parents, childless couples, and nuclear families are equally valid. Public campaigns must normalize and respect these structures. Valuing parenting choices: Instead of stigmatizing people who choose not to have children, society should emphasize the quality of parenting and child development in families that do. Cultural shift: Encouraging gender equality in caregiving and household responsibilities makes family life more sustainable. Balanced outcome: Social acceptance helps reduce stress while gradually motivating people to consider parenthood in a healthier environment. Government Incentives Financial rewards: Tax benefits, housing support, and free school education for two children can make family growth more affordable. Healthcare benefits: Free maternal and child healthcare ensures safety and reduces costs for parents. Practical approach: Incentives should encourage, not compel, couples to have children. Coercion or penalties can backfire, as seen in past population control drives. Population Stabilization vs. Family Freedom Two sides of the coin: On one hand, falling fertility rates can lead to an ageing population and shrinking workforce. On the other, unchecked population growth strains resources. Controlled growth model: Setting an optimal family size—such as two or three children—can strike a balance. However, fining families for exceeding the limit can be socially divisive and raise ethical concerns. Alternative solution: Instead of punitive measures, governments should create positive incentives for compliance, while educating people on the long-term social and economic benefits of balanced family sizes. Towards a more refined Strategy India’s demographic challenge cannot be solved with a single strategy. It requires a multi-dimensional plan that combines: Education and awareness to empower choices, Economic support systems to make parenting feasible, Social reforms to value diversity, Non-coercive incentives to encourage balanced growth. This ensures that the rights of individuals are protected while also maintaining demographic stability for the nation’s future.